About me!

The subject of personal data storage in organisations has reared its ugly head again. Human rights campaigners have warned of such data being held by certain bodies, the fear of improper usage, but most of all inaccurate information and the damage it can do.
Hear hear I say;
You may be wondering why I have chosen to speak out about this. Well, I have too been the victim of improper data collection…

Let me fill you in.

It all began at a gathering at a friend’s house. There I was minding my own business (eyeing up the table of food to be precise) when a ‘Hello’ took me by surprise.
“Oh Hi.” I replied.
There beaming at me was this bloke. “I’m Jignesh,” holding out his hand.
“I’m Jo Jo,” I reached out taking his hand.

After we exchanged names, we did the ‘how we knew the host’ and then finally, ‘the what we did for a living’… Jignesh began first.
“I’m in marketing” He announced rather proudly. There was something quite child like in his stance. It reminded me of Cousin Minu Didi’s little one. Whenever asked her age, she stands quite straight and proudly announces ‘I’m 5 and a quarter.’
The quarter being extremely important
.
Jignesh spent the next fifteen minutes telling me and the others around me about the weird and wonderful world of marketing.

Apparently, what we buy, our age, things we’ve said in surveys, etc, put us into a demographic and marketing firms then target us with appropriate good and services.

“Take loyalty cards,” Jignesh began explaining with a serious tone to his voice. “They give you only a penny for every pound you spend. And they get billons of pounds of marketing data in return. They have an in dept picture of each and every person. That’s what I compile. Potential customer profiles.”

I think that was a fancy way of saying this guy was the one who set us up for cold calling and spam emailing.

THOUGHT PROCESS AT TIME.
So let me get this straight…

1) You choose people at random.
2) They’re tracked them until you know every little thing about them,
3) Then the harassment starts?

...My god, that’s one step away from stalking.
Help! I’m trapped in a confined space with a potential lunatic…

“Everything you do is worth billons to a marketing team’ He repeated his face beaming having failed to notice I was looking more and more alarmed with each passing sentence.

The way he was talking it’s as if somewhere out there is an unsuspecting building, where once inside you’re face to face with a wealth of high tech gadgetry, like something out of ‘Spooks’. In-depth dossiers about me and my lifestyle are stored and updated with every frivolous purchase. Lots of men in suits do that intense walking and talking down long corridors (that’s the bit in ‘Spooks’ I do like; Rupert Penry Jones and Raza Jeffery were fucking A-class at it) and if televised there’d be very choppy camera work – to give it that urgent feel.

“Marketing is so slick,” Jignesh continued, foolishly proud that he had a hand in our on going harassment, “everything that comes to you is tailored to you.”
“Yea right!" Interrupted the host Prakash “I’m inundated with emails about Rolex watches, do they know how little I earn?”

Another guest started complaining about the spam regarding luxury apartments in Dubai. “I can’t keep up with the mortgage I have here, let alone abroad, no matter how much Kristy Allsop and her heaving bosoms try to entice me.” He then looked straight at me, “Don’t you agree Jo Jo”
“Hmmm,” I nodded uncomfortably trying to be as non-committal as possible. I was hoping as hell it wasn’t expected for me to divulge what successful person-esk product was I being bombarded with.

If the marketing fraternity have my bio data, then that’s a bit worrying.

Jignesh’s words rang like a scary echo in my ear, ‘everything that comes to you is tailored to you,’ and in some cases I can see how.
My friend Hiten always has coupons for 2 4 1 meals at certain eateries, as he likes to dine out a lot.
Another friend Meera is always forwarding me 20% off coupons at The Gap and Oasis. This suits her, as she is a fashionista
But do I get inundated daily with hordes of emails to purchase Rolexes, or to join in with the Dubai set, or invited to dine with a friend at certain eateries?
No!
Valium, Viagra and items that should help improve a flagging sex life.

THOUGHT PROCESS AT TIME
Why? Who’s said what? Any allegations are unfounded and can not be proved.

Where are they getting their data? What kinds of lies are being spread about me in marketing no man’s land.

There have been times, I would like to make it clear, where I have single handedly kept the shops in Hounslow High St in profit with the use of my credit card alone. I’m always hooking up with friends for lunch, cocktails with the girls on a Friday night.
And as for intimate business; that is private and I do not talk about it BUT, if a I have to frog march any ex-boyfriends in front of this marketing maniac to publicly put the record straight, then god damn it I will.

I should be within this demographic – the sassy, financially independent girl-about-town category.

I’ve never understood those people who spout, ‘if you got nothing to hide, then you’ve got nothing to fear’
Well it’s fine & dandy for them; lets see how long that stance last once they’ve been inaccurately branded as a spend thrift manic depressive who has no stamina and is more than a tad frigid between the sheets – the injustice.

Course of action? Shall find my local human rights group and join forthwith.